![]() ![]() We peppered family and friends with endless questions about child rearing. We watched the Dog Whisperer in order to acclimate our terrier for the baby-on-the-way. My husband and I moved from our one-bedroom apartment into a “family” home we could barely afford. But I treasured every moment I had with this new life growing inside me. Yes, I threw up every day for six months, and yes, the stretch marks were (and still are) obscene. I have a heroic husband! After taking the pregnancy test, I held the paper strip while waiting for the telltale sign to appear and thought, “I have to be pregnant! I will not be okay if I am not pregnant.” It was an odd thought since I was 25, and my husband and I had no intention of starting a family until we were in our 30s, but as the slender strip turned blue, I leapt into the air with joy. It’s a long story-but yes, I shared my honeymoon with my entire family. I found out I was pregnant seven days after my wedding. I simply would have stared at the interviewer with an expression of deep, deep loss. ![]() If I had been able to truthfully convey my ordeal with postpartum depression under the glare of those lights, I most likely would have said no words at all. On screen, I had seemed so together, so okay, as if I had everything under control. I said things like “It was a nightmare,” or “I felt like I was in a black hole.” But I couldn’t even begin to express my true feelings. In it, I was asked about my experience with postpartum depression and as I watched, I cringed. I recently saw an interview I did on TV while promoting a film. Love, gp Bryce Dallas Howard on the Emptiness of Post-Partum Depression Below is an indelibly beautiful piece by Bryce Dallas Howard chronicling her very personal experience. Not only from a hormonal and scientific standpoint, and why so many of us experience it, but from the perspective of other women who have gone through it. For about five months I had, what I can see in hindsight as postnatal depression, and since that time, I have wanted to know more about it. Instead I was confronted with one of the darkest and most painfully debilitating chapters of my life. ![]() When my son, Moses, came into the world in 2006, I expected to have another period of euphoria following his birth, much the way I had when my daughter was born two years earlier. ![]()
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